literature

How to Comment on dA

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Literature Text

1. LOL Subjective If you don't like something, even if the person put time, effort, and thought into it, it isn't art. To further assert this truth, be sure to go to the person's deviation and/or main page to tell them that you think their work isn't art because you don't like it.

2. Hydra Stuck in an argument? Feel like you're losing or the other person is making points that are too logical for you to even attempt to debate against just fucking silly to you? Re-jump into the same argument using a double account. Two heads are better than one, right? So two accounts must make your side all the more valid. If you can make an account where no one can guess that it's yours, all the more bonus points for you and your craftiness at hiding yourself on the internet. If you're -that- clever online, you must surely be a master ninja in real life. Additionally, telling the person the same thing using a different account name ensures that they see your side of things more clearly.
It's like what they taught you in school: repetition, repetition, repetition.

3. He Said, She Said Know what else is valid? Saying something like, "well, my mom said-" in an argument. Because nothing is more authoritative and word-of-law/God than what the mother/friend/older sibling/dad/uncle/pet monkey of a random stranger on the internet said to you. And because you care about what they said, everyone else on the net should care.

4. Trololol Go out of your way to insult someone else and then feel a little icky at the response you get back? No fear. Just mask your asshurt pass yourself off as a troll.

Ex.
"Fuck, this person gets more attention than me and I don't like their work, I'll flame them and tell them it's shit!"

Mere clicks later...

"Your work is utter shit and it's fucking idiotic."

"lol don't care, faggot."

"Hahah, you fed the troll!"


Because god knows you can't get the attention you seek any other way Also, if the person responds/defends/or makes a logical response to your bullshit clever maneuvers, just accuse them of being "butthurt" despite the fact you were the one who cared enough to start something in the first place over something you didn't like and because the internet is your playground where you and only you can say what you want and because you're king of the hill, you never get asshurt nevar evar.
"No U" is also a good comeback when someone accuses you of asshurt.

Ex. "So I like how you're trolling in anger despite the fact my work wasn't even directed at you or a specific person."

"Uh, NO U because you're responding to ME and that means I'M getting the reaction and I WIN I WIN I WIN IWINWINWINWIN I WIIIIINNNNN1111"

5. Only "Popular" Artists Are Dicks and Arrogant Jerkfaces Because poor little obscure "arteests" can never be arrogant or spiteful ever. Humph, those stupid talented animu artists with their head in the clouds getting more faves than me I'll show them...

6. Whut Maturity If you don't like something on the net, why bother containing that inside you and waiting until you explode? In fact, why just limit it to your own account and/or personal journals? You must make it your duty and first priority as a human being to confront the other person
about how much you think they are absolute shit and should be treated as such because they draw something you don't like or have a differing opinion from you. If comments are disabled or you find yourself blocked, you must find an alternate route or anonymously troll. Why should your rights as an American be infringed? First Amendment, hoes. Not American? Or maybe the person you're talking to isn't American? Well, then fuck you, you don't matter. Also, bitching about your right to "free speech being infringed" on the net due to disabled comments or blocking preventing you from making a bigger ass of yourself you from expressing yourself like a free human being is totally not ironic when you also go around touting, "it's the net. I say what I want where I want even if it's someone else's page/work and if you don't like it get the fuck off."
Totally. Not. Ironic. Fuck restraint and the fact a number of people either keep to their own personal space and ignore something if they don't like it and move on. They're just weak.
Also, because the world revolves around YOU as a commenter.


7. Name-Calling Name-calling is a magical method that automatically makes the other side feel weaker and makes you look stronger. The harsher and more derogatory your slurs, the more valid your argument is and therefore the higher chance of winning you have. It's like a shoot out. The first person to throw insults has a higher chance of winning. Just like the first person who shoots has a higher chance of winning. Typing your insults in CAPS also spells "gang bangin' time" and shows you totally aren't fucking around in here. Bitches better watch out, son. That guy used the word "FAG" in all CAPS. He must be out for some killin'.
Also, some exotic weaponry one can use to further a point in an argument are, but not limited to:
fag, faggy, faggot, faggut, fagget, faggo, fagalicious, fagger, fagalaglag, faaaag, FAG, FAG, f-a-g, and Gaf. Which will confuse your opponents because it's totally "fag" backwards and they're too stupid to tell.

Also, "nigger."

8. Bitches and Dicks Saying "I'm a dick/bitch" at the beginning or end of your messages completely and automatically absolves you from taking responsibility or owning up to any of your actions. It also isn't making it look like you're saying "LOL I'm obvious" because people totally can't tell when someone's being outright jerktastic or douchebaggy to them.

Ex.
"You're a stupid fucking piece of shit because you don't agree with me, unblock/undisable me so that I may continue to act this way towards you."

"Uh, no?"

"Well, you need to hear all the jerktastic things I have to say and some people are naturally dicks/bitches and I am one of them."

Uh, no fucking shit. I MEAN. MY GOD. We must all see the error of our ways. How -dare- someone prevent you from being the biggest, bestest self-righteous dickhole you can be on
someone else's page.
If they refuse to give in to your repeated harassment, just call them "cowardly" and continue to note them until you get banned your way.
Prompts from ~Akillian and *linawifeofL with "flame wars on dA" and "How to Comment on Popular Articles/Deviations" with some illustrious examples. :iconimhappyjrplz:
So I tried to combine the two with throwing in a little bit extra.
A number of people threw in some pretty colorful ideas but these two stuck in my brain the most at the moment. (but the tentacle rape suggestion still sounds fun lol).

At first I tried making something like this in "comment form" like the youtube one but decided it was too soon and too similar so I changed it around to be more "How To" styled.


Edit:
First off, this isn't meant to say , "lol anything but OMG UR ART IS AMAZING" is necessarily bad. But I -do- think comments like, "this is stupid, i hate it and it sucks, etc." don't really do anything for anyone and aren't entirely constructive.
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