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October 27, 2012
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I'm just going to dub it "Reverse Nice Guy Syndrome" for now because I don't know if there's a proper title for it, but I've noticed that there's a peculiar little bug that hits various people (although certainly not limited to "guys") that causes them to genuinely believe other people (or certain individuals) "owe" them attraction. In short, it's basically like "Nice Guy" syndrome in that it involves a feeling of self-entitlement, but in this case it can sometimes be a somewhat backwards attempt at empowerment in that the "syndrome" causes people to believe that if another person does not feel attracted to them, physically or otherwise, it is automatically the other person's fault entirely, and they are labelled as "shallow" (or an asshole, jerk, bitch, haughty, etc.) simply because they do not have an attraction to or possess a desire to sleep with the "deserving" individual. Like the "Nice Guy," the person always feels like they are the victim in the situation, and in many cases is not content with "just friendship." The "reverse nice person" will also often feel a sense of bitterness at a lack of perceived "owed attraction" and may take it out on others by being passive-aggressive, condescending, or accusatory. A lot of this syndrome can often stem from individuals with poor body image or internal struggles with accepting their appearance, but instead of coming to terms with the fact that many different people have different preferences and dealing with their image issues in more positive ways, they take it out on others.
And that's where I have a problem with this.

I can understand it when people struggle with weight, bad hair, certain things they don't like about their face, physical insecurities, etc. or whatever because many people go through with things like that and it's not always easy and sometimes it takes a long time for people to accept those things about themselves, but the second you cop a "get in my bed or get out of my face" attitude, my patience drastically dwindles. It may be in part due to parents or certain authority figures trying to instill a sense of self-confidence or empowerment in their kids while they're young by teaching them "if someone doesn't like you because of your weight, hair, nose, etc. or doesn't think you're pretty or handsome then those other kids can go screw themselves," but the intention may have been an -attempt- at positivity, it's warped. And the fact that some people think that they can take out their rage over unrequited attraction at others in various forms is, frankly, wrong and fucked up.
Yes, it is often wrong to treat people differently or like "lesser" human beings because of the way they look or simply because -you- don't find them attractive (ex. like how someone may be more polite and generous to a girl that's dolled up instead of one that isn't or how some people will act like normal civil human beings until some awkward-looking gangly kid with acne comes along and then the behavior turns outright sour). That's obviously wrong and unacceptable and I can understand why people would be upset over bullying or unfair treatment over appearances in those cases because it's like," okay we're gonna be normal civil human beings unless it involves a person we're not attracted to because a person deserves less of my civility if they're not good-looking to me."
But when you think people "owe" you attraction and think along the lines of, "well, if so-and-so doesn't think I'm good-looking, handsome, pretty, etc. and they don't want to date me then fuck them they are an asshole." Or, hell, just even the mentality of, "if someone doesn't think I'm attractive or isn't attracted to me then they're shallow and can go fuck themselves," even when the person has never had a history of treating you poorly due to your appearance, is highly problematic.
That's the biggest thing that bothers me about this mentality. Look, I really don't care if you're the most confident person in the world or the meekest person in the world, if you think people automatically owe you their attraction or should possess an innate desire to sleep with you or be with you, you're delusional and self-entitled. Period. You can throw endless tirades and fits about how people who aren't attracted to you or your body/appearance are automatically "shallow" or "assholes" or "aren't worth your time," but I reckon that will just want to make them be with you less. It also makes you look like brat with a huge complex and sense of self-entitlement. In the real world, people aren't going to magically and automatically switch their personal preferences and desires around because -you- think they owe it to you to do so.
Whenever I see stuff like:
"that guy chose some skinny girl over me what a fucking shallow piece of shit how DARE he go for that stick-thin skank i could so do so much better guess he doesn't want a REAL girl fuck both those assholes what a shallow dickhead"
or
"goddamnit she went for that bigger hulking guy i cant fucking believe this i guess girls like her really are all shallow whores who cant recognize a decent normal man when they see one guess she doesnt dig guys that are down-to-earth like me i guess that cunt doesnt have taste"

It makes it...infinitely harder to be sympathetic towards someone with that mentality in any. Like...infinitely harder. Especially when the "reverse nice" person then finds it acceptable to keep making advances on the person that said "no" in the first place and attempts to "guilt" them into being attracted to them. As someone who has had somewhat similar experience with these kids of people as well as friends who dealt with these people on an almost 'stalker'/harassment level, I'm a lot more likely to become aggressive towards you than sympathetic if your "oh woe is me" fuckfaced behavior continues and escalates to something higher. For example, as someone with a skinnier body, I've had some people exude this mentality that if skinny people weren't automatically attracted to a "bigger" person (oddly this "bigger" person would always be the same individual bringing it up) that it makes them automatically "shallow" (despite the fact that, preference-wise, there are times when you can find some people of a certain body type attractive while another person with a very similar body type not-so-attractive, same can be applied to bigger or smaller people, although this doesn't have to be limited to weight and can be applied to other aspects of appearances) Likewise, I notice people with those expectations often cop the same "woe is me i guess your just SHALLOW for not going out with me or thinking that I'm hot" mentality, when having a personality like that and being vocal about how you think people need to "want me or fuck you get out of my face" mentality is just a massive repellant for people who don't appreciate attempts at "guilting" or passive aggression (or plain outright aggression) just because you think people owe you their attraction. It's childish and it's delusional. And at best it makes you look like a spoiled brat while at worst it makes you look like an angry, hostile pressuring bully.

Same thing when some people have certain people express attraction to them after they change something about their appearances. I know the thought process behind it is "well if they really like me for who i am they'd wanted to have gone out with me before i lost weight/cut my hair/shaved/etc." but the same sort of idea can also apply. People have different attractions. I know there were times in the past when I didn't feel attracted to someone until they got a haircut or grew it out or lost or gained weight, but while that didn't necessarily mean I wanted to go out with them or be with them, I can't help what I'm attracted to and I can't say that I necessarily feel bad about it either. If it were a case of, "i was treated like dirt until i put on makeup and did my hair a certain way" or "these people used to treat me like shit and make fun of me until i hit the gym and got toned and now they talk nice to me" or whatever, I could see the frustration on some level because that involves others being nice and civil to a person based on appearances. Then there are cases where it's less about common civility and more about people being upset over the fact that others didn't express attraction or romantic interest until they lost a bunch of pounds or used to look look a homeless person with extra miles of hair and then 'cleaned up' and started noticing people coming on to them, but again, different people are going to be attracted to different things. Some might come onto one type of appearance, while others might find another kind attractive. It's always going to depend for different people, but people don't owe you unconditional attraction.
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:iconsolosyndrome:
SoloSyndrome Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I notice this a lot with guys (meme sites and real life). Not denying it doesn't happen with girls, just my personal experience. It makes it extremely hard for me to be nice and interested in a guy because I always feel like if I just can't normally want a friendship level. If I only show a slight normal friendly interest, I immediately must be interested to crawl into their beds. If I turn out not to, some get extremely pushy and/or disrespectful. It really comes over as if I am something to be won over or owned, not as if I have my own brain and my own attractions.

Also, only a few guys are like that. Most of them can be extremely friendly and interested in a friendship with girls, but it's those few guys that ruin it for the rest, because they make me paranoid.
Reply
:iconmileniakitsuvee:
MileniaKitsuvee Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh this describes someone I knew since High School. I knew from the beginning they were going to be like that (they exhibited the whole "nice guy syndrome" from the start but since they were a friend of a friend's I tried to be nice and even didn't mind hanging out with them when I was with my friends.)

Sadly they could not accept their place as "just friends" and was always throwing "clues" or saying to other people how "that girl doesn't give me a chance she just stuck me on the friend zone" and even though I clearly stated I was not interested in anything but friendship they kept on with advances and shit. And worse part is some people even tried to make me like them/pair me with them.

Since I never "budged" they turned around and started bashing everything me or my friend would like/posted both online and irl. I was also suddenly classified as a "shallow bitch" and they were always posting "nice guys finish last" posts on their social sites and saying things to others like "yeah man girls only want bad boys fuck that shit they're as shallow as hell" or started making sexist comments sometimes when me or my friend was around. :/

Worst thing is though, they are still like that. .__.

So in short; I understand where you're coming from.
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:iconteavian:
Teavian Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012   Digital Artist
I have a friend who is a little like that. He's a pretty nice enough guy but when it comes to relationship situations, he always says he "needs" a girlfriend to be happy, and that no girl ever gives him a chance, that they're all shallow for it, that the nice guys always finish last. He even lets himself stay in dead-end relationships just so he doesn't have to be single. I just think he wants to be in a relationship for all the wrong reasons. And he does tend to blame people a lot for problems sometimes, kind of a drama machine.
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:iconin-the-zone:
In-The-Zone Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Reminds me exactly of the stupid "Friend Zoned" meme made by guys who whine on reddit and other off branch 4chan sites.

I've dealt with all types of people you mentioned. The dolled up thing with people doing favors for me or just being nice, and the stupid guys who thought they could take a gamble and push the boundaries further by asking personal questions or worse because they gave no actual fucks that my boyfriend existed.

One time a guy from a fandom of a band I like was chatting with me for about a month and he sent me some of his art prints on my texting number.

An unusual chat occured when he started telling me of hos sex life and I was listening anyway but not revealing any personal info. So while he's trying to get the info out of me and gushing over me, he sends me a pic of his chest. Moobs. Thats right, moobs. Guess who had the phone? Not me. So bf asks wtf is thst pic of and I'm like I don't know. Then this horndog tells me he's embarasses and asks for validation if he looks ok. I'm like "dude, you sent that to my bf, he has my phone at work" and he trips over himself rather ashamed. My bf thinks this guy was hitting on me so he politely told him to scram.

I stopped talking to the guy after that incident, but it wasn't because of the moobs pic. It was his beligerant sexual desire to capture my atttraction and he kept showing me pics of himself for validation. I liked some of
His art, and he wasn't a bad looking guy, he was just a sad desperate person and I know to stay de fuq away from these types because they do not give a fuck if you say "hey uh not cool" until a boyfriend pops in.

I have more stories.
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2012
(sorry for the late reply, my time on here has been more sporadic lately)
Given the audacity and sheer creepiness of that man's behavior, I wouldn't have blamed your boyfriend if he had given the guy a less-than-courteous response. He seems like he has this mentality of, "i like girl therefore it must be acceptable to keep pushing things onto said girl."

The fact "stories" like this are so prevalent for so many women just makes it worse. It's like an epidemic.
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:iconin-the-zone:
In-The-Zone Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
It's okay. Also sorry for the typos I was on my phone. I just came back from a con, and I kept hearing of those kinda situations happening to other girls as well.

I dunno why, I mean there are plenty of dudes who respect a girl's boundaries but I dunno why they feel the need to take a gamble with odds highly stacked against them. They just do it anyway, and often the case is that they are drunk, or arrogant and desperate or all three.
Reply
:iconboofeh:
Boofeh Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I have two larger friends - one male and one female - and for a while there they clicked wonderfully and we thought that they might start dating. They're both good friends of mine, I think they're both actually reasonably attractive and I wanted to see them be happy with each other.
But then it came out that he was not attracted to her for whatever reason and decided that he was better off moving on. He broke the news to her as lightly as possible and tiptoed on his way.

The days following she acted as if the world was falling down around her and fuck him because he was a shallow sonofabitch just because she's a larger girl and he's a fat bastard she could do so much better and why don't guys ever like larger girls cry cry whine whine. She got over that eventually but her way of dealing with the pain his rejection had caused her was to act like the victim. We all got pretty sick of it pretty quickly.
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:iconpullitapart:
PullItApart Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
The people who suffer from this kind of run too strongly on emotion, you know? They don't try to think about why the other person might not be attracted to them, they just assume they're a douche and leave it at that. It's important to be able to step out of a situation and see it from their perspective. If someone doesn't like you, don't assume they're just a hateful jerk, because then you're subconsciously building a list of people you think are hateful jerks and really you're just becoming a hateful jerk yourself.
Reply
:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
I realize a lot of it is emotional for these individuals, but at the same time, these same people don't do a good job of taking in the perspective of others as well, thus the behavior. And it's harder to be sympathetic when they tend to take that anger or frustration and push the blame onto others or use it to engage in increasingly unwanted behavior. At some point, it stops being "try to understand/sympathize with these suffering individuals" and more "if you don't stop your passive aggressive/stalker/arrogant self-centric mentality the real world is going to be a lot tougher on you."
Reply
:iconpullitapart:
PullItApart Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
Yeah, that's what I meant to say. I don't know if what I said came across as a defense for these people, but I didn't mean for it to be.
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
Nah, it's cool. It was pretty understandable.
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:iconguineveredolls:
GuinevereDolls Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
Have you been browsing 9GAG?
Reply
:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
I don't set foot in that cesspool.
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:iconguineveredolls:
GuinevereDolls Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
It used to be fun, but now it's filled with people like the "nice guys" you mentioned.
Reply
:iconstandingleaf:
StandingLeaf Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Hobbyist Filmographer
Wait, did you actually saw that LiveJournal page before you made that journal?
[link]
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
I haven't used LJ in forever so my answer would have to be "no."
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:iconlhene-amira:
Lhene-Amira Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Student Writer
All of your rants are amazing. Just... amazing.
So full of honesty and truth and wtfiswrongwithyouworld.
Reply
:iconnaomihansen:
NaomiHansen Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Student Digital Artist
I'll just assume that I have permission to slap them if they act like this to me. Do not make me feel guilty for having standards you don't meet, because I'm sick and tired of that crap.
Reply
:iconlongfuse:
LongFuse Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Yes.
Reply
:iconzeartist:
Zeartist Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
In the final paragraph I wanted to add something: Let's say you don't become attracted to someone until you get to KNOW them, hmmm? OR the exact opposite occurs.

But shallowness IS one of the most unattractive traits in a human being.
Reply
:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
By exact opposite, what do you mean, exactly?
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:iconzeartist:
Zeartist Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Well let's say that one sees another, finds them physically attractive but they get to know them and they find their personality a turn-off?
Reply
:iconin-the-zone:
In-The-Zone Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
That's easy. I'm sure you have seen it too. I knew a few people that I found attractive but once they opened their mouths? Nope. Or this other time, last year my guy friend was dating a pretty gorl, she was cool too. Until around the summer time she started acting bratty and ludicrous over things that weren't real issues. She broke up with the guy 3 times, 3rd time was final. She was emotionally abusing him, but he was too strong to notice or care about that, he was more pissed with her bullshit and her illogical reasons for being mad.

When we went on double dates she ruined everyones fun. He told me he was no longer attracted to her because of her personality and he used to find her rather attractive but, her personality destroyed it all. Even to his friends like me and my boyfriend.

So that's an example.
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:iconzeartist:
Zeartist Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Oh I'm sure we all could give examples. I had a girl (emphasis on the word GIRL) who was a fan of mine but one day she decided to turn on me. To this day I don't know the reason and it's been two-and-a-half years.

She's become my own personal stalker and has spent all her time and energy to destroy me. She's failed, though. But sometimes you just don't know someone until it's too late, huh?
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:iconin-the-zone:
In-The-Zone Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh wow, I saw that scenario too from another friend. But the fan was a guy and he turned into a failtroll. I dunno why but half these young little shits think it's cool to be trolling after they've been kissin' ass for so long, lol.
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:iconzeartist:
Zeartist Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
"Failtroll". I'm gonna have to remember that one.
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
Tbh, I feel like one could easily answers both these questions for themselves.
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:iconincylilspider:
IncyLilSpider Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
Although I haven't met people who act like this in real life, I've got to agree with your argument.

The point that really got to me, however, was the example of the aggressive girl saying "I guess you don't like REAL woman, if you date that skinny bitch." I'm a big girl myself, but I still go into a rage whenever anyone goes on about, "oh I only like REAL woman, not skinny girls." I've seen it in advertisements even; "clothes designed for REAL women," or some crap like that.

It's so insanely hypocritical to me. A bigger person can moan and complain about how people pick on them about their weight and then turn around and say a thin girl or guy isn't "real" or some shit, just cause he/she doesn't have curves or muscles. Isn't that the exact thing the bigger person was just complaining about? People picking on them because of their weight? Saying someone isn't a real person because their thin, is the same goddamned thing as saying that about a bigger person, but it's so much more acceptable to rag on a thin person then a big person. Making fun of a bigger person is "a low move," making fun of a thin person is "lol hilarious, fuck that skinny shit."

People don't realize things go both ways, just like with this article, thinking people need to find you attractive, is just as shallow as the jerks who treat you like shit because your not attractive to them. Hypocrites everywhere!

Sorry for ranting, but the phrase REAL WOMEN is just an epic pet peeve of mine. Awesomely articulated article man.
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:iconin-the-zone:
In-The-Zone Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconfacebooklikeplz:
Reply
:iconlhene-amira:
Lhene-Amira Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Student Writer
Here here. I hate it when people say "lol, give that bitch a sandwich" or the like. Everyone has a different body type, and none of us should be made to feel ashamed of ours.
Reply
:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
Pretty much this. Even if the media caters more to certain body types than others, I don't think that should lessen one type of body over another in real life. Especially since putting down one type to seemingly "bring up" another is never the answer.
It's a peeve of mine too, so it's cool lol. And thank you.
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:iconyumithedragongirl:
YumiTheDragonGirl Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Student General Artist
I knew a guy like this in high school. Now he's my number one enemy and I can't stand the sight of him.
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:iconzeartist:
Zeartist Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You don't see him anymore, do you?
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:iconyumithedragongirl:
YumiTheDragonGirl Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Student General Artist
We go to the same college, so I do run into him now and then.
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:iconzeartist:
Zeartist Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Aww, shit. Sorry to hear that, I know what it's like.
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:iconmelansgirl:
MelansGirl Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
I'm kind of going through something like that right now.
I've dropped over 70lbs in weight [because I really wanted to and for my health], and people are treating me different. Its been fairly difficult to deal with the new attention I'm getting, but over time, I've had to teach myself on how to deal with people who now stare at me, whistle, etc etc...
Because I've gone over time from the sort of body type that few people are attracted to [even though I have a very nice personality, I hated myself and how I felt trapped in that body] to a body type that many find attractive [Hell I found I've even got an hourglass shape].
My thinking is this: You cannot love others fully, until you learn to love yourself. And I've learned to love myself.
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:iconzeartist:
Zeartist Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Congratulations on your achievement! :)
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:iconjoejoeyjoy4:
joejoeyjoy4 Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Student Writer
I agree 100%. What I don't understand about this mentality is like... has there never been someone who had feelings for you, who you didn't in return? It's not like there are people who date literally any possible partner they encounter, at least I don't think so.

And physical attraction is important in a relationship, yes, that kind of sucks, and it is on varying degrees to different people, but I would never date someone I didn't find at least a little bit attractive. I just wouldn't. I would feel incredibly uncomfortable.

Also, why do they start slandering off the person whom they liked as soon as they choose someone else? They musn't have really liked them that much to begin with if their whole opinion of them changes entirely after being rejected.

In short, not every person you like will like you back, and the percentage varies from person to person, but everyone is going to have bad experiences at one point or another. I usually develop feelings for someone after being friends for a couple of weeks or months, and even though that has its downsides, too, at least they know you're genuine and vice versa.
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:iconnotgregarlink10:
NotGregarLink10 Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012
People need to be cool guy
and just chill day everyday.
Yeah.
Reply
:iconomega23:
Omega23 Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I know a guy just like this. He genuinely believes that because he's a "nice guy" (spoiler alert: he's actually a raging douchebag) he should have ladies falling at his feet. Ignoring that fact that he's only decent-looking at best, which is just my own personal opinion and may not be another person's, he's also incredibly shallow, constantly stating that fat chicks are gross and he will never date one, he gets very possessive over the girls he dates, even once going so far as to threaten a close friend of mine because she and the girl he was dating have been friends for a long time, and he's incredibly clingy and gets serious way too fast. He once told a girl he loved her after knowing her a week. A week! Then whined and complained when she broke up with him, seeing nothing wrong with his behavior or taking into account any personal boundaries he might have crossed.

The point is, I know exactly what you're talking about. These self-entitled assholes that think they deserve the best of the best when it comes to the dating pool and when they don't get it they whine like spoiled children and then turn around and act like shallow douchebags when it comes to people who are actually attracted to them because they don't meet their own standards of beauty. AKA the biggest hypocrites on the planet.
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012
He sounds like the kind of guy that would go to a convention and make shitty comments at female cosplayers for not meeting the physical standard of the characters they're cosplaying while he dresses up as a character he barely resembles.
For some reason, this is what that reminds me of, but nonetheless, I know EXACTLY the kind of personality you're talking about.
Usually the people who have unfaltering beliefs in their own "niceness" are the biggest tools.
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:iconomega23:
Omega23 Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Tool doesn't even begin to cover this guy, trust me. Anyway, it's these kind of guys that brought about the "friend-zoning" trend, so that's reason enough to find them tedious.
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:iconmokimeow:
mokimeow Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
(by the way, i love it when you post journals like this, because i always love riffing with other people about assholes and their assholish ways. does that make me an asshole too? you decide...)
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012
(nah, i don't think it does and a lot of people notice the same behavior so i think you're good on that front)
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:iconmokimeow:
mokimeow Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
at first i thought you were talking about the other girls/me syndrome haha. its quite similar actually, the sense of superiority that someone whos not "popular" or "shallow" feels just because they can distinguish their "they're"s from their "there"s(oh my god i am already confused by my own sentence) and because they read comic books or something. you know the type.

it also reminds me of the girls that try to act like they're empowered if they're rude(i.e.: "if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best" or "yes, i'm a girl, i can go from normal to bitch in 0.5 seconds") as if being a douche will make people less sexist towards them.

its the general attitude of trying to attain power or whatever it is through guilt and coercion and general bullying. but it doesn't matter who you are or what you look like, no one owes anyone sex or anything like that. it's a shitty attitude to have if you're conventionally attractive/popular/skinny/etc, and it's a shitty attitude to have if you're supposedly ugly/a nerd/fat/whatever.

anyway i think what you're describing really boils down to nice guy syndrome, but more of a specific thing some "nice" guys/girls try to do(i say nice but they may not always describe themselves as nice, it's just the sense of entitlement). "nice guys" often use the same guilt-tripping tactics("friend zone") ("i was ALWAYS there for you") ("what, are you gay??) ("what a bitch/asshole") ("you're just shallow") while stroking their own ego("whatever, i'm a better person") ("haters gonna hate") ("she wears short skirts i wear t shirts im not as big of a slut hahhaahha"). they just take advantage of whatever differences there are between them and the "ideal" as part of their douchebaggery.

it's really funny, how these people claim "everyone is beautiful" but then turn around and shit talk people who are getting more attention than they are. well not funny. more like lame.
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012
I guess some people may find similarities between "other girls syndrome" and "reverse nice person" syndrome, but "other girls" irritates me just as badly lol.

I JUST saw a post with a punch of screencaps off of FB with a collection of "normal to bitch" statuses. And I remember there was a Nicki Minaj video floating around where she talks about being a "bitch" and being a "boss." It's like, okay, women DO get more shit for being assertive, but there's still a difference between standing up for yourself and acting like an asshole (what's funny is Minaj tends to be on the tantrum side herself, and I'm saying this even though I like her music lol). Uggghhhh....I hate that Marilyn quote so bad. It's used as an excuse for some pretty snotty behavior imo. And by girls who are only Marilyn wannabes, no less.

And everything else you just said right there. And the one thing all those groups have in common is that they all play the "i am so different/special/not-like-the-others."
And some of these people use their disadvantaged status (doesn't necessarily have to be race/sexuality/etc., but using their status as a "geek," "outcast," "dweeb," "poor socialization skills" etc. and if you say anything against them or call out their behavior it's like, "how dare u i am a victim."
lordy these people
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:iconmokimeow:
mokimeow Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
lordy all these people amirite
i like to generalize and say its high schooler behavior and soon they will grow out of it but that seems to be a positive outlook since that is not always the case at all

i love it when people misquote celebs!! that reminds me of when people misuse that morgan freeman quote on racism(something about it being over when we stop talking about it) to say "HEY A BLACK GUY SAID STOP TALKING ABOUT RACISM SO YOU CANT TALK BAOUT RACISM LOL" and that's..........yEAH.........hmmmm....but anyway racism is a different topic i just mean in general when people get someones cool take on things and twist it to serve their own fucked up outlooks

i hav e got to agree w/u on nicki minaj there too, as an aside. she has some truth to her statement, but it dont mean hey since guys get less flack for bein an asshole girls should get to be more of an asshole!!! people need to learn the difference between assertive/asshole
like
omg excuse me for using homestuck as an example but
there was a conversation between tavros and jade where tavros was trying to be "assertive" and he said something akin to "well maybe if i ignore when you ask me not to do something and do what i want anyway it means i have self esteem" and she pointed out that no, thats not always the case and thats just being an asshole. its the same thing.

other girls syndrome doesnt irritate me /as much/ because it doesnt perpetuate as much harmful behavior as nice guys syndrome, where imo the attitude of entitlement only encourages more unwanted advances and other unsolicited bullshit which we all know can be dangerous.
the other girls syndrome seems like just a sheltered girl trying to rag on the character of people she's never met in hope of building herself up in someone elses eyes while still trying to act modest about it.
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:iconin-the-machine:
In-The-Machine Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012
high schools can be a huge pain in the dick but when you see that the person's like 25 and still acting a fool like that it's just like "oh gosh fukkin wow."

When it comes to famous people quotes, there are 2 things i hate awrite, it's 1) misquoting them and twisting the words and 2) when they think it's a substantial and meaningful quote that can justify anything just because it came from a celeb or famous person and it sounds deep. like that one quote where it's all, "be happy if u have people who hate u cuz it means u stood up for something."
no in real life i'm pretty sure it means you're most likely some kind of dickshit.

but seriously, that tavros scene you just described sums it up pretty well.

while 'other girls' is less likely to lead to aggression or stalking (except when you confront them about their behavior lmao) i still think it perpetuates some really shit ways of thinking and really judgmental attitudes. like this was making the rounds a while ago on the tumbly [link]
and this same girl had another artwork where she's like "i wanna see the batman movie" and then it shows a second panel where she puts a gun to her head smiling and says "oh wait i dont have friends." [link] and then her blog had a post with a photo of her giving two middle fingers to the camera. and then there was another one where she drew herself with all these girls wearing makeup and she's like, "am i the only one who isnt a slut???"
it's like....if you're really as friendless as you claim, there's a reason for that. and i'm pretty sure it's not because you're "misunderstood." and it sort of perpetuates stereotypes about how girls who wear makeup, go to clubs, etc. are shallower than "snowflakes" like her because LMAO I LIEK AVENGERS!111"
but that's my take on it
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:iconmokimeow:
mokimeow Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
yeah thats why i can give high schoolers the benefit of a doubt. i was pretty stupid and sheltered in general back then so i mean...yeah. at my age now id have no excuse lol.

thats another thing i hate!! isnt that a fallacy, something like...appeal to authority, or whatever its called?? oh well..people will do it anyway.

i remember most of those pictures going around on tumblr. there were a lot of funny photoshops. i agree that it does perpetuate stereotypes but i think thats more detrimental to girls in general. perpetuating the stereotype that most girls are catty, shallow, backstabbing bitches etc...instead of saying "well maybe other girls have different interests than me," that one girl would rather draw a line between her and other girls and keep the stereotype while making herself the exception.
terrible, maybe not dangerous. but yeah i agree its still bad.
and more high school behavior.
SIGH
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:iconzzombieluv:
Zzombieluv Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I know someone who fits this definition perfectly. He always preaches for equality yet if you don't find him attractive or fit his standards he automatically categorizes you as an unintelligent, shallow, generic person. (One of those people that think that wearing make up means you're trying to hard.)

What do you think of the "Friend Zone," thing?

Personally, I think its stupid because it implies that the only reason the guy would want to be nice to the girl and be her friend is to date her. Every time people complain about it, I imagine the conversation in my head: "You're not attracted to me? Then why the hell am I your friend?" Some friend.
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